(Talking about a piece of film in which red stuff is smoothed around someone's head)
It looked like a red martian being smoothed, for presenting to the Queen or something; "we must smoothe you, red martian", it did, it looked very much like that, and I've seen it on an episode of "I'm bonkers".

(Talking about Blue Ice, frozen excrement falling to earth from aircraft)
Can I just ask, it happens twelve times a year, poo goes into sky, but why? How can twelve times poo escape from aeroplane? Where? Is there a hole where poo goes "ooooh, we must tunnel"? Makes no sense.

(Trying to spot the odd one out from Shakespere, The Queen, a mayfly and King Lot Kappa Iowa Kimian the Fifth of Hawaii)
Eddie: Well, Shakespere liked trains, the Queen's really good at badminton, the mayfly was the ship that first went to America with the founding fathers, and King Lot Tutan Kamun was in charge of the guy who was in charge of Dano in Hawaii Five-o. Errrr, they're all Nazis, except the mayfly, who's an insect, and can't legally join the Nazi party.
Ian Hislop: The ship that went to America was the Mayflower.
Eddie: I know. It's called comedy.

(In the missing words round)
Eddie: You put one blank, we think one word, but you put one blank with three words, and that's just like the Nzais would have done.
Ian: You have an interesting view of that period of history.
Eddie: Oh, no, these are modern Nazis. They're much less together now.
Angus: And they present gameshows, do they?
Eddie: Oh, you tell me!